A BOLO must have been issued on me by this time. I can feel the long arm of the long arm of the law reaching out for me now. They must be searching me now with dogs, helicopters, boats and psychic Clara Baron. Posters of me are being made and being sent to Slovenia, satellite photos are being snapped of my house. The Pennsylvania State Police Criminal Investigation Analysis Unit will review the case. No wait, that’s what happened in the investigation of Ray Gricar.
In my case, I just found out that the City of Philadelphia, the City of Brotherly Love and Empty Pockets is taxing bloggers. I live in Philadelphia, so it’s either pay up (or pay the right people off) or go to the gray bar hotel. Well not really.
Philadelphia is not taxing bloggers, it is taxing profits made by bloggers. Philadelphia taxes profits in general. You need a business license to operate a business in Philadelphia, which costs $50 per year or $300 for a lifetime license. Then you have to pay a percentage on your profits.
So, what am I going to do? I could flee to Slovenia, but they have had an extradition treaty with the US since 2008 (funny how I should know that off the top of my head). I could move to Centre County, but “J. J. in Port Matilda” just doesn’t have the same ring.
Actually, I don’t have to do anything. I do consulting in Philadelphia, and I have my Life Philadelphia Business License for several years. I only have to pay for the profits I make blogging. That is a zero amount. As I’ve said in the past, I do this blog voluntarily. I wouldn’t object to getting paid or getting a Mercedes for my long work on this blog, but I get nothing. Any percent of zero is zero. I’m safe from the Philadelphia Tax Police, but they are not safe from my ridicule or the ridicule of hundreds of other bloggers, inside the City of Brotherly Love and out.
I will be able to continue blogging even with the threat of the Philadelphia Revenue Police dropping its Special Weapons and Taxes from a helicopter. I’ll be fine, so long as they don’t drop a bomb on the building this time.
E-mail J. J. in Phila at email@example.com