Healthy relationships: Join the ‘Respect That’ campaign during Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month
Go back to your teenage/young adult years. What occupied your thoughts? How did you spend most of your time? For me, I remember always being a planner and looking ahead — I got my first job and immediately began saving for college and looking ahead to the grown-up years. Gossip would spread through the high school like lives depended on the news reaching one end of the hallway to the other. Teenage years were full of innocence, immaturity and bad clothes.
But for so many teenagers and young adults, those years are also full of dread and even trauma. As many celebrate the month of love in February, let us also think of those who are not in situations where they are loved in healthy ways.
Dating violence is more common than you may think, especially among teens and young adults: 1 in 3 U.S. teens will experience physical, sexual or emotional abuse from someone they are in a relationship with before becoming adults. Nearly half (43%) of U.S. college women report experiencing violent or abusive dating behaviors.
Each February, young adults and their loved ones nationwide raise awareness about teen dating violence through Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month (TDVAM). This annual, month-long effort focuses on advocacy and education to stop dating abuse before it starts.
The 2025 theme for TDVAM is “Respect That.” Selected by love is respect, “Respect That,” is a powerful concept that can transform relationships. Respecting someone is not just a vague idea; it is action and mindset.
It is important for partners to communicate openly and honestly about their feelings in a healthy relationship. This is so neither of them has “authority” over the other. By doing so, mutual respect is fostered, and misunderstandings or conflicts are prevented from escalating. Healthy and loving relationships can happen when respect is a cornerstone and that is when trust and emotional safety thrive.
Show respect in your relationship in three important ways (compliments of love is respect).
1. Respect boundaries
You have the right to build and establish healthy boundaries. Depending on the nature of the relationship, establishing boundaries may be easier said than done. Boundaries help define what you are comfortable with and how you want to be treated by others. They allow you to honor your needs, goals, feelings and values. Boundaries can be emotional, physical and even digital.
Healthy boundaries:
I am cool with following each other on social media but not sharing passwords.
I am comfortable kissing and holding hands, but not in public right now.
I am OK with texting occasionally, but not constantly.
I am comfortable with some touching, but I am not ready to have sex.
Unhealthy boundaries:
I need to know where you are always.
If you love me, you will not spend time with other people.
I need you to stop talking to other people because you might cheat, and I get jealous.
I cannot stand to see you struggling like this, so I need to help you change.
2. Respect consent
Healthy relationships allow partners to communicate openly and to agree on what activities they want to pursue. Whether it is holding hands, touching, kissing, having sex, or anything else, it is important for all partners in a relationship to feel comfortable with what is happening every time.
Consent involves respecting boundaries and not making assumptions. Consent should be clear, enthusiastic and freely given. When practicing consent, here are some flags you should know:
Green flags indicating that your partner respects consent include:
Is this OK?
Do you want to slow down?
Do you want to go further?
Should I stop?
Red flags that suggest your partner is not respecting consent include:
Pressuring you to do things you do not want to do.
Saying that you “owe” them something (i.e., material items, sexual acts, etc.) because you are dating or they “did something” for you.
Reacting with sadness, anger or resentment if you do not consent to or do something.
Regardless of previous consent or actions, or if you are in a committed or casual relationship, you should always get and be able to give consent. People have the right to stop any activity at any time, even if they have previously agreed to it. Consent is not just about sex; it is also about respecting boundaries and people’s feelings.
3. Engage in respectful communication
Growing up, you may have been told to keep your thoughts to yourself or that your feelings did not matter because of your age. These messages can lead to relationships where you fear sharing your thoughts or you feel unheard and unappreciated. You should be able to voice your concerns and needs without fear of harming the relationship. Healthy relationships require respect and communication. Make sure to speak your truth respectfully and listen to your partner’s point of view. Together, you can find a solution that works for both of you.
No matter your age or experience, know you are not alone, and help is available — whether you want advice or to talk through something you have experienced or are experiencing. Centre Safe’s 24/7 confidential hotline is 877-234-5050. Learn more about Centre Safe at www.centresafe.org.